Girls

Girls can be down right mean to one another. The "you can't play with us," starts as young as Preschool. Girls can be their worst enemy and can be each other's worst nightmare. I can remember being in the second or third grade and walking out on the playground when out of nowhere a little girl maybe a year or two older than me, decided she didn't like the look of me and yanked me to the ground by my hair. That was my first experience with a serious mean girl.

As a Women's Studies major I have done a lot of research, contemplating, reading, thinking, speaking, and writing, on this topic. I could, but won't go into who is to blame, the list it too long and most of you would stop reading because we've dealt with it or heard about it our whole lives. If you really want more answers or need girl friend advice, visit the Friendship Blog. I think we have bigger things to worry about and pitting women against one another or talking about how "bitchy" we all are--it only adds fuel to the fire.

For example, did you know that California women only make 85% of what a man makes for doing the same job? Now that's something we should be focusing on. I think we let petty things get in the way of real issues and if we as women, the majority mind you, grouped together to tackle problems that all women face, we would not only be happier and healthier, but less inclined to claw the eyes out of the woman next to us.

I think a lot of things boil down to confidence. I think we are all born with confidence and for some people it gets "knocked down" or worn away by life, other people, and certain experiences. I have always been fairly confident in my abilities. Don't get me wrong, there are days when I allow others to tell me my dreams are made of pipes, but I still dream them. For instance, my dream is to one day own my own Tea Shop. My families running joke is, "You might as well open up a Smoke Shop, since its' a pipe dream." Joking aside, they would support me no matter what. (*I plan on charging them double as retribution.)

There's a great article on confidence over at the Tiny Buddha. It is not only a reminder on how to build confidence but how to live the life you want.

If you're too lazy to click the link, I'll summarize:

• Know your strengths and weaknesses
• Trust your Capabilities/Believe in yourself
• Expect Success
• Take risks
• Learn to Receive Praise

It's never too late to be the person you have always wanted to be. Treasure your true friends and cultivate friendships with the women in your life that you respect and trust. Be kind to one another and for all the ladies reading this, don't judge other women. You have no idea what kind of day they have had, or what road they've had to travel. I have found that when a woman seems to be glaring at me, the best response is to smile. Once, a woman with "poop lip" (a face scrunched up in disgust, as if smelling poop) was staring at me and my smile stopped her. She smiled right back.  I don't think she even realized she was making that face, but my smile made her change her whole demeanor. 

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined." -Henry David Thoreau